Have you lost faith on all humanity? (long) please answer and read?

I’ve lost faith in all goodness of humanity. Maybe it was just my time to learn this hard lesson in laugh. I can’t say that no body warned me. I had plenty of warnings. Don’t trust anyone!!! That was the philosophy I was brought up with as a child till 18 my mother told me everyday: YOU TRUST PEOPLE WAY to much, you shouldn’t be so kind, stop being so nice to people. People will just walk all over you. Don’t give a helping hand they will take you down with them.” And I’ve always wanted to think that’s not true. I’m kind, there has to be more people out there like me, Right? (WRONG) I really wanted to believe people are kind that there is kindness in humanity deep down. Just some people have bad days but every one is kind. Everyone has a heart. So I learned that I was in denial this whole time…the hard way. How? Well in high school I was known as the nice girl: yeah people pushed me around but they would feel bad when they did cus I was “nice” and then they wouldn’t or I always had other friends that would stand up for me. And I would help out the bullies in school so they would become my friends and also would say you ever get in trouble we got your back. And so far I had proven everyone including my mother that sees everyone is kind. You just got to look deep. School was pretty easy going. Oh how I miss it so much. But I did keep in touch with my closest friends. Sarah was my best friend and so was Jason. Both I’ve met in 9th grade. Great people loyal, kind, honest, funny, fun, smart, etc… its been 4 and a half years since I’ve met them. And I would never think that they would ever do anything to harm me. Jason has never gave me trouble. Always been a loyal friend and still is. He’s great. One of those people your lucky you met in your lifetime. And I think sarah was like that. I probably trusted her a bit more cus even my family trusted her. She was a lot like me. So we entered college together took the same basic classic classes together towards the end of the first year she had changed. Started doing drugs. Lying. And I would try to help her. Tell her to stop. To drop her new friends that are corrupting her. She didn’t really listen. But she knew when she was in trouble I would be there to help her. And that’s what she would do. Call me when she needs help even if it was 3 am in the morning. I would get up and pick up the phone call. I always thought if I let go of her she would fall in the hole she was digging herself in. I really didn’t want to be friends with her anymore cus I was scared I was going to get pulled in with her trouble. But she told me she would never do that to me. I believed her. I would tell Jason this and he would always say wow you’re a good friend. I would of stopped helping her out months ago. She started to get better so I felt like I was helping her. And she would tell me I was her best friend. So one day she went to the gym with me with a free guest pass. Now I told her if she could watch me purse will I changed to go swimming. She was talking to one of the people there cus she wanted to join the gym too. When I come back we went in the pool and she told me she had joined the gym. I said cool. I didn’t suspect anything. No reason right?


Well two days later she ran away from her house cus her mom told her she couldn’t date her cheating drug dealing boyfriend. And she just ran away. Her mom came crying to me and asked me if I would know any where she was and I couldn’t lie to her in her eyes especially when she was on her knees crying to me. That would be a dishonest cowardly thing to do. So I said yes. And I took her to friends house not my friend, I don’t know that girl I just know where she lived cus she would stop by sometimes to pick up things I would just stay sitting in the car waiting to go home. I didn’t know if she was there but at least it would get her mom off my back. So I took her there. And she was there!!! Argghhh!! She hated me. I told her it was fine. I wasn’t friends with her anymore cus she wasn’t the person I knew before. I tried to help her, advice her I couldn’t do anything more for her. I told her this was it. and sorry. We aren’t friends anymore. If she sees me please just walk on by. Her mom smacked her face and so did her dad… I didn’ t know that I didn’t see that. That’s what her sister tells me. And then two weeks after that. Her mom and dad call me telling me sarah is suing them for domestic violence. That broke my heart. She has a great family, gave her everything she ever wanted. Never hit her till that day. And they only brought her home cus they didn’t want to see her throw her life away. Her parents got a restriction order from her. And if they get near her or try to contact her they get 2 years of prison. And then whatever my heart really reached out for that family. But I couldn’t do anything for them. And then I was checking my bank statement and I noticed they are charging me for a gym account..thing is I don’t pay for my gym my parents do. So I go to the gym and said well someone used your card to pay and open an account. And I said who. They said they can’t tell me. And I started talking to the guy and I even started crying that he checked and undernation the user id was Sarah. I couldn’t believe it. that day I brought her to the gym and told her to watch my things she used my checking card to sign up and make payments directly to my card!!! I don’t work. I’m a full time college student. On scholarships. How could she. How could she do that to me after all I’ve done to help her. And this is before she got caught before she ran away. He could she do that to someone she called her best friend! There is no good in people. No one is nice and the nice people get destroyed with people like this. You can’t be nice in this world. Everyone was right. Don’t trust anyone. ….and now that keeps repeating in my head. I never wanted to be cold. But I know now I have to. Never trust anyone again. But how, how do I start.????? Tell me where I go from here.Have you lost faith on all humanity? (long) please answer and read?
Trust is the only way we can keep on living. We have to trust people every day. We have to trust that the trashmen will pick up our trash for us, that the mailman with deliver us mail, we have to trust the people that make sure food is good to eat, trust the people on the highway when driving, that they won't fall asleep at the wheel. And we have to trust God with our lives. Without trust you can't live. Alot of things may go wrong, alot of people around you may not be trustworthy but there are MANY good people in the world. Don't let anyone convince you there aren't. If the world was all bad we'd all be dead. Your friend needed help and you did the best you could for her, but even if it failed you still have to carry on! Don't just think ';Everyone else is evil, might as well join them.'; But ';be the change you want to see in the world.';





';If I treat you as though you are, I will make you worse. But if I treat you as though you are what you are capable of becoming, I will help you become that.';





^^ think of that quote when facing your friend.Have you lost faith on all humanity? (long) please answer and read?
That was a lot to read wow umm right now i think your just hurt and you got hurt by someone that was really close to you i know exactly how you feel but you cant turn cold because then that makes you like everyone else I'm sorry to say but your mom didn't tell you right there are nice people in this world and people will run all over top of you if you let i know.


You have to learn when to say no but don't turn a cold shoulder to everyone because of what someone else did i had someone i considered a friend hurt my feelings so bad and it made me feel like i had no friends in the world and like everyone was against me but you cant live like that i just recently had someone i considered somewhat of a friend steal 100 dollars and I'm pissed but I'm not gonna treat everyone else bad because of that but believe me when i see this guy I'm gonna hurt him real bad or have someone else do cause i cant beat him without killing him and the only reason im gonna do that is because it was my sons daycare money i work hard and i have done so much for him for him to steal from me like that.


Kinda got off point but the point I'm trying to make is this it could be a cold world and there are mean people in it but you have to see the beauty in it and know that nice people still exist and not only that but this life is temporary you have to make the best of it SO Live Love and Enjoy and don't stop caring learn form your mistakes and one other thing drugs will change a person so while shes into that kind of thing leave her alone and if she ever recover from it forgive her just don't leave your purse with her.
she was your friend. the drugs changed her. if she was clean, do u think she would have done that?? u have to trust people, just choose those people carefully. u also have to learn that u cant save anyone who doesnt want to be saved. dont give up on humanity because of one drug addict.





also, the people who walk all over you are a- holes. they dont deserve trust. screw em. like i said, just choose who u trust carefully.
i understand why you think that your friend is at fault here, but i think that you were also the unkind one.





drugs can screw people up, thats why your friend was acting so differently. from what i read, it looks like you explained this to her and she understood. but it was NOT necessary for you to try and change her. you made your opinion clear and you explained that you would always be there for her when she needed help and thats where you should have stopped. she didn't listen to your plea's with her because no one wants to be preached to. TELLING her to stop doing drugs and TELLING her to drop her friends was completely uncalled for. if one of my friends were to order me around and try to control my life(which is what it kinda seems like you were trying to do), it would only make me want to keep doing what i was doing. if only to prove that it was MY life, and not theirs to control.





and about the gym membership thing, you could have just talked to your friend about it. and you shouldn't even have to keep the gym membership. I'm sure that if you explain the situation to the gym, they will cancel the membership and refund your money. after all, YOU did not request a second membership, so YOU should not have to pay for it. i understand that you feel betrayed because she used your money to buy something for her, but she's been with you for 4 1/2 years and you shouldn't throw that all away because you don't like the lifestyle that she has chosen for herself. because, like i said earlier, drugs screw people up. so you cant blame the gym membership thing on your ';old friend'; because she wasn't your ';old friend';when she did that.





and telling her parents where she was staying, was a mean thing to do. i know you were just trying to do what you thought was right, but look at all the trouble that you caused. you could have just turned the parents away saying that you knew where she was but you couldn't tell them for fear that they would do something regrettable. they would have been very upset, but it would have been the best thing for everybody. then, you would have had the chance to sit down with your friend and explain how badly it was hurting her parents and persuaded her to, at least, call them and let them know that she was safe. also, refusing to tell her parents where their ADULT daughter was, would NOT have been ';cowardly';. it WAS cowardly, however, to sell you friend out.





i think you need to go back to your friend and apologize. say that you were just upset about all the drama that has been going on and you didn't mean to over react and end your friendship. you don't have to mean the apology but you need to get back into your friends life. if she does fall into a ';hole';, as you put it, then you'll feel incredibly guilty for just walking away when she needed you.





honestly, i don't feel like you were true friends at all. you stated that you ';would of stopped helping her out months ago'; because of what she was doing with HER life. a true friend would stick by her and help as much as they can WITHOUT controlling her life and WITHOUT thoughts of giving up on them. if you truly cared about your friend you would do what you can to keep her as healthy as possible while still letting her make decisions for herself. if you force her into a sober life, it will also force her to lie to you about what she is doing. apparently, though, she is already doing that. you should take that as a sign that your forceful coercion is not working. she needs to learn the error of her ways on her own. if she doesnt then she may just return to her old lifestyle if you DO happen to get her clean.





one of my best friends is an alcoholic and has been for 3 years. i can no longer think of what to do to help her. so, instead of persuading her to stop drinking completely, i try to accompany her wherever she goes. when she goes out to drink, i remind her that she should keep it down to a 1-3 drink minimum, depending on what she is drinking. when i think shes had or will have too much to drink, i remind her of that and ask her wait awhile before having another drink. at this point, i also tell her that there is still alcohol in her stomach to get her drunk and another drink isn't needed so soon, but i always leave the decision of whether or not to have another drink, up to her. if we hear about a party, i offer an alternative activity on the same night, where there wont be drinking . she knows that I'm only trying to keep her safe and alive so she doesn't usually mind. I'm not forcing her to stop her habit and I'm not forcing her into anything she doesn't want to do. i think you need to try this with your friend.





i get how badly you feel about this whole thing, but your friend needs you and if your not there for her now then your going to regret it later. you'll lose a great friend because you couldn't accept who she has become. things change, people change, and if you cant roll with it and learn to deal, then you'll be left behind with no friends at all.





I've gone through something like this, and maybe remembering that situation is causing me to put too much of the blame on you, but i really hope that i wasn't too mean. I'm seriously not trying to be a b*tch, I just want you to understand that, maybe, your friend isn't the only one to blame.





think about it. also, not everyone in the world should be written off as someone unworthy of your trust. there are some REALLY good people out there.





i hope everything works out for you. good luck. (sorry about this MASSIVE response.)
My best friend Ashley, we've been friends for almost 4 years. We met in 7th grade in one of our classes. She was the best person, and was a great girl. But once we got to our sophomore year of high school, we're growing apart. I ask her what she'd be doing for a weekend and she would say nothing. Then the monday after, she'd come to me saying the party she was at over the weekend was awesome. I knew there was alcohol and drugs there. Cause she would talk about those too. And how they almost got in touble with the cops.


She does this EVERY week. (During school anyway).


I used to tell her EVERYTHING. But now, I can only tell her half of the things I used to. I've told her I've had problems with her and her attitude, but she says sorry, and just goes back doing it again a few days later.


It sucks to loose a friend. I feel I'm losing her. Then about three months ago, she told me she attempted suicide. She told me and I was blown away. She doesn't seem like the person who would do that. I don't even know why. I've told her to do positive things for yourself and other people. I told her that I recovered from my attempt (Yeah, me too). That I promised myself I'd do better things for myself and my other best friend Steve. It helps, because whenever I tell him about something I've done to harm myself, I can see him all torn up inside and sad. So I don't want him to feel like that anymore, so I've stopped and it works.


She told me she doesn't have anyone like that in her life. I know better. She does.


I'm worried about her this summer for the first time ever. I hope she'll do ok. And not anything to bad.


I'm scarred because she's the first person I have ever trusted since the 3rd grade with anything. I'm afraid to lose her because if I do... I won't have anyone like her for a long time. I mean it took me 4 - 5 years to find a friend like her. I hated the process and it sucked. But once I found her, I was grateful.





Sorry to pour my story into your story. I don't want to give a cliche answer, but I feel so terrible for you. It sucks when you've worked hard for someone and they do that (or something like that).
Well just cause of ONE person you loose faith in HUMANITY? which involves thousands of ppl? I am thinking that that girl only used you cuz of your kindnes and took advantage of you. she doesn't deserve a friend like you and she shouldn't be a friend to anyone else as well. you can try to sue her as well for bank fraud too, cuz she did that to you without your premition. she should be the one going to jail not her parents.





I am just like you, i am kind, nice and sincere to ppl, thats how i made friends here cuz of that. but once someone does anything to break my trust for them, i never go back to them, ever. you should do the same thing here.


i am sorry that i couldn't be of any help but i think that you know now that that girl is evil and deserves no kindness.
That was incredibly long, and I just read the entire thing. I completely see where you are coming from: you have just had a very traumatic experience. This was a blow to your self-esteem, confidence in others, and well as your trust. HOWEVER, it is not fair to say that no one in this world can be trusted, because there are many people out there who would give their life for a loved one. There are people out there who would help their best friend out whenever they needed it: people like you. The only problem you had, was that this friend became hooked on drugs and wasn't herself anymore. She didn't know how much it would hurt you by stealing your money, since her judgement was impaired. There are certainly people out there who you can trust, you just have to choose wisely.





I hope you get through this situation: I know you will, and I also know that you will once again have faith in humanity. Just know that there is always support out there, and if a major event like this happens to you, there is always a safety net. And you never know, this girl may clean up her act, and come back to you in tears, thanking you for all you had helped her with. Just relax, and give it time. Things will work out.





Peace
First of all, she was on drugs.


People do lots of things when they're on drugs.


Okay, so for example, I had this cousin I was REALLY close to, and I trusted him.


Then one day, my cousin calls me and says ';Ina ..... Zet is on drugs .... and he hit Anis'; and then I was like ';WTF?!';


And then I saw him in a mall and he stared at me.


He then came up to me and said ';Are you Ina?';


And I was like ';No ...';


And he's like ';Hey c'mon! I'm Zet! Your cousin! Hey can I borrow 10 bucks?'; and then I said ';No ... I don't have 10 bucks!'; and then he started saying all this crap about me being his closest cousin, and then I said ';Shut up and go away ... I don't have 10 bucks';


And then he slapped me across the face and walked away saying ';Stupid girl';.


You see, people do things others don't expect them to do.


That's how drugs work.





Hope I helped!


Lots of love,


Qistina
Who in God earth would want to read all that? You need a friend to talk to (this isn't the place). No I have not lost all faith in humanity. There are good people and bad people in this world as you will also find out when you grow up and mature!